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Habits, the things we do on autopilot, can lead people to success, productivity, and better health. There are countless books on how to create good habits. From spending to studying, eating to time management, researchers have found the things we do over and over make a difference in the way we live. As homeschoolers, this rings true. The habits my children and I have either help or hinder our learning time. They also impact the general running of our home and the time we have to spend together. Homeschool habits can create peace or chaos.

As we move into 2020, I’m thinking about the habits that help our day and the ones that need some attention. Maybe you too feel the muchness too much screen time can offer. Or maybe you’re wanting more flexibility, less rushing around, to be a person who is not exhausted at the end of the day. Here are homeschool habits to help all our days feel successful.

Your First Habit of the Day

When things feel a little wonky the first thing I do is look towards myself. Regardless of my role: teacher, homeschooler, and mother, and as easy as it can be to point fingers, the only thing I have true control over are my actions and chances are there is something I can do to make things run smoother.

For instance, if you’re like me, you’ve developed the bad habit of grabbing your phone first thing in the morning. I don’t think about it. I open my eyes, roll over, and it’s there in my hand. Instead of starting my day off calmly and in quiet, I’ve habitually chosen to be inundated with emails asking for my attention, breaking news (never calming), notifications, and the endless scrolling of social media. Inevitably I get sucked in and instead of reading or writing, two things I say I wish I had more time for, my day begins the opposite of the way I’d like it to. Enter a child or pet who needs something, and any hope of a truly quiet start is lost.

Instead of starting the day off with a habit that depletes me, I want to begin my day with something that brings me joy. To create this better habit, I’ve started turning off my ringer. My phone sleeps on the other side of the room, and lately, the first thing I see and reach for is the book I’m reading. I’m finding just ten minutes of reading gives me the same chance to linger in bed a little longer, like my phone once did, but my days start with what I truly need to begin, peace and quiet.

Your Child’s First Habit of the Day

Just like us, our children might need help creating a habit that launches them kindly into their day. While I’m sure it’s different for some, like me, my children have never done well starting with technology. On weekends and during breaks when we don’t have a lot of expectations for our day, sure, but on days where we have lessons or a full schedule, technology is best saved for the afternoon.

Depending on your child and their age, there are all sorts of habits that can help them begin their day. Here are some of the ways my kids have successfully started their day.

• Audiobooks– for kids who need alone time. My daughter’s current go-to, I know she’s up when I hear Wings of Fire turn on.
• Breakfast– for kids who need food. Ever since my kids were little, I’ve made sure there were plenty of things they could easily make or eat as soon as they woke up. This allows me a little extra time to finish up work or walk the dog. They often listen to audiobooks or podcasts during this time too.
• Read Alouds- for kids who wake up needing to snuggle. A good book or two and someone to snuggle up with can make all the difference.
• Table Activities– for kids who wake up raring to go. Put out a couple of activities on the kitchen table the night before. Playdough, paints, a Lego challenge, or puzzles (changed up each day) are fun and engaging ways to start the day.

Habits to Care for Your Space

I love homeschooling and all the creating that happens in our home on a daily basis. I also love having a clean kitchen when I go to make dinner and waking up to a tidy house. I don’t enjoy picking up before I can start my day.

While I don’t think we have to be minimalists (and I joke with my family of collectors I couldn’t be if I want to keep living with them) I do think it’s important our things have a home and are returned to their home when they are not in use. Being tidy makes finding the things we need a lot easier, which makes learning and project time a lot easier!

• Have a dedicated space for everything. It’s worth the time it takes. Have your kids help sort and label.
• Get kids into the habit of picking up and putting away books, learning tools, toys and games before they begin something new. You can always make this fun by having it be a race.
• Have kids clear the table and/or load the dishwasher after they eat.
• Have a set time for morning or evening chores.

Habits to Help Your Routines

There is always something to do. When we homeschool, chores can feel like a constant nag asking us to choose- clean laundry or read to the kids. Add in the fact that many of us also have jobs, volunteer, want to have a social life and hobbies… it’s a lot!

I don’t want to spend my day running around like a madwoman. I don’t want to be busy or rushed. But in order to move through my day at a pace that feels enjoyable and get things accomplished, I have to be organized. A general rhythm to our day not only helps me stay grounded, it greatly helps my kids. Whether you unschool or recreate school in your home, I think creating a rhythm or routine is vital. Habits to help our routines run smoothly are as well.

• Wake up and/or Bedtimes– Getting up before my kids always make my day go smoother. Having a set time when we all head to bed does too.
• Start and End Times– Getting into the habit of sitting down at the table together and wrapping up at a certain time has helped my daughter transition and focus. It also helps me to plan the other parts of my day.
• Phones off- Just like when I’m in a meeting for work when I am working with my kids, I turn my phone on silent.
• Laundry– Having a set time each day or during the week to do laundry is so helpful. I start a load of laundry in the morning, switch it at lunch, and one of us folds it at 5 pm when we do chores.
• Food– Meal Plan and have a dedicated time each week to grocery shop. I meal plan on Thursday and my daughter and I grocery shop early Friday morning after we drop my son off at school. She has recently started getting her own cart and taking half the list. After years of shopping with me, she knows the brands and sales to look for and her help cuts our shopping time in half. I don’t typically cook extra or freeze meals but I know this too can be a great habit to get in to.
• Dedicated Work Time– So important if you work from home; I have finally got in the habit of scheduling my work time like I might something that I must do or want to do.
• Family Meetings– Here’s a mantra I’ve had to repeat as a type-A person over and over again- “I don’t have to be in charge.” It’s true. Our families live, work, and play in our homes and therefore should have just as much ownership and responsibility in how things run. Get into the habit of meeting with your family regularly to discuss what needs to get done, who is going to do it, how things are going, and what changes need to be made.

Breaking Up with Bad Habits

It takes a while. Some will tell you 21 days, others two months, the fact is in order to create a good habit or break up with a bad habit we have to put in the work. Set timers, use post-it notes, ask your kids to remind you (mine love to remind me of something I should be doing), and try try again.

Just like getting our kids into the habit of brushing their teeth and washing their hands after they use the restroom, a good habit is worth the time and reminders.

Once the habit is set in place, it will be okay to break it now and again. Flexibility is also so important. Just today my daughter got invited to go on a spontaneous trip to the Children’s Museum. It means our day will not go as planned, but we can pick up where we would be when she gets home or rearrange things. Either way, the habits we’ve spent time cultivating will still be there.